This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Winning The "I Love This Blog Award"

After having an up and own, roller coaster kind of week, I was happy to find out I won the I LOVE This Blog Award from The Minute Man's Wife late last night. It's just what the doctor ordered.

Speaking of doctors, my wife had to have an ultrasound and other tests done to see if she had blood clots in her legs and other health risks. I had been worried about test results this past week and when I found out she didn't have blood clots, I felt better. A big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. There are still other health problems that she has- but they would take too long to describe here. I hope these other things, regarding her health, will be resolved in the near future. I don't see any reason why they won't. With the new medication she is on, for the other problems, she says she is feeling better already.

In gratitude of this award from Minute Man's Wife, I'm going to put aside the topic I was going to discuss today. Although she's a relative newcomer to this blog, I've grown to appreciate her funny and heartfelt comments. Do yourself a favor and go to this woman's blog. It's excellent. Her writing is sharp and really draws you in. She's funny, serious, wise and completely honest with how she feels and she tells it like it is. My kind of blogger. Check out The Minute Man's Wife.

The rules with this award say I gotta share 10 things. Just like TMMW, I wasn't sure what this meant either. lol. Could be ten scabs of dead skin. Or ten wascally wabbits- but I don't have any. Could be ten words of wisdom but I think I've blown my sloppy wisdom all over the place in Friday's post. Still cleaning up from that nasty episode.

Now, if I were a bettin' man, I'd hazard to guess they were talking about sharing some personal facts about yourself when they thought of the "ten things" rule. Luckily enough for all of you, I just happen to have ten exciting, knowledge-you-couldn't-live-without type of facts about myself that I've kept hidden underneath the bed- just in case of a rainy day.

Prepare to be WOWED.

#1- I sleep, totally naked, on my belly, because that's the only position I can sleep in. Please be considerate and do not fuck me in the ass. And please, whatever you do, kindly refrain from putting refried bean paste in my bare, hairy ass crack and using this as a reservoir for nacho chip dipping.

#2- The way I like my eggs: scrambled.

#3- This occurred in my very wild twenties: Instead of a mistletoe hanging from the living room doorway at my Christmas party, I hung up a big dildo I had bought earlier that week. To my amusement, people still kissed under it, drunk and not giving a shit what was hanging over their heads. By the time I woke up, half dead from partying, in the morning, it wasn't hanging up over the doorway any longer. It was on the floor, in the corner of one of my bedrooms- sticky, dirty and covered with pubic hair. No one I asked could or would tell me anything about it. To this day, it's still a mystery. I guess it wasn't used on the cat. It was still alive at the time.

#4- I'm a Libra in the wheel of astrological signs. A Rabbit in the Chinese zodiac, for what it's worth.

#5- I love these books and many more: Earth (The book) by Jon Stewart and The Daily Show writers, K-Pax by Gene Brewer, Lost Horizon by James Hilton, The Sexy Book of Sexy Sex by Kristen Schaal and Rich Blomquist, Kurt Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions and Clive Barker's Books of Blood series. I'd be here all night if I listed all of the books I've read and loved. :)

#7- I would like to go back to Arizona for a third time and walk on The Grand Canyon Skywalk. It hadn't been built yet when I went to the Grand Canyon the first two times. I wonder if they would let me pee over the side.

#8- My shoe size is nine or nine and a half, depending on the make or brand of the footwear. Fascinated? Come on... admit it... you are. :)

#9- Halloween costumes worn in the past: A Jinn, a Rastafarian, a woman, a priest with his pecker hangin' out (a big plastic dick was used instead of my real penis. I thought it might be less scary), a ghost, The Batman, a zombie/cowboy and a gynecologist.

#10- I need a new computer. Buy me one!

The Minute Man's Wife passed this award on to three blogger recipients. I'm being a stingy bastard this time, when it comes to handing out awards and I'm going to give it to only one of my new favorites, Bar Science, an excellent booze blog by the blog author, G. It has a lot of interesting facts about all things boozy, travel stories and videos that offer handy tips on this, that and the other. Mostly, booze, though. Great writing can be found here, my friends. Very much worth checking out.

Again, the blog is Bar Science. Get over there, pronto and drink one or two or ten for me.

Well folks, that's all I got for now. I'm barely slipping this post in under my self-imposed deadline. Take care, everyone and don't do anything I wouldn't do! tee hee

19 comments: said...

Grats to you, and to G!

And #1 and #2, don't sweat it. Me too. However, unlike you, I don't fear the frijoles... it sounds kind of fun, actually.

The Wolf said...

Nothing wrong with scrambled eggs, though I prefer the scrambled brains of my foes served to me on a silver plate with a nice red wine.

It's funny you mention being a Libra, and have 9 1/2 as your shoe size because I'm the same. The only difference is that in the Chinese zodiac I'm a ram.

bazza said...

Well Kelly, your fan club is rightly growing and spreading across tha Blogosphere. Glad to learn that Mrs K is doing well and hope she continues to improve.
Now I'm going to check out the Minute Man's Wife.... I mean that in nice way!
Bazza’s Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

Annabelle said...

Good brought me here.

I'm slightly concerned for all the things we have in common, but hey, nobody wants to be alone in their crazitude, so there's that.

Kelly said... Thanks, man. The best thing about having folks eating frijoles from one's butt crack would be the point where you cut an explosive fart, sending bean shrapnel everywhere. Now there's your fun!

Kelly said...

The Wolf- Or how's about Scrambled Brains A La Mode? The horoscope sign and shoe size aren't the only things we have in common. I noticed we think the same on a lot of stuff, too. That's scary, eh? You're a Ram, eh? I think they're supposed to be stubborn. Not sure. My wife is a Ram in the Chinese Zodiac and she's friggin stubborn as hell, for sure.

Kelly said...

bazza- Yeah, it does seem to be that way. It's nice to see and interact with fresh new faces- as well as old ones. And thanks for the well wishing on the wife's health. OMGosh! You're going to check out that Minute Man's Wife? Such a naughty man you are! :) Seriously, yeah, I'm glad you did. She's great. I saw that you commented on her site, earlier. Take care, bazza!

Kelly said...

Annabelle- Ooohh now... Don't be concerned. Ya know what they say... Insanity Loves Company. lol. Long live Crazitude!

G said...

Cheers Kelly, I'm stoked...truly

Damn it means I have to follow your crazy 10 things to share - which is a tough'll need some thought

klahanie said...

Hey Kelly,
As you will know, I was aware of you receiving the 'I LOVE this blog award' from, 'The Minute Man's Wife'. Actually, I checked out that site, was very impressed and linked into the site, before you even submitted this posting.
'The Minute Man's Wife' has a keen eye for talent and thus you were very much, a most worthy recipient :)
You and I have also interacted via other means and you will know how relieved I am for your good lady and your good self that the test results were favourable. That's good to know, cause I do understand, despite your often zany and surreal writing, that you are a deeply kind and sensitive dude, who, despite your own concerns, is trying to make us smile :)
Now then, ten wow-provoking facts about you. All deeply fascinating info and I thought you told me you wore 'My Little Pony' pyjamas. Guess I was wrong and you'd rather sleep with your hairy ass crack gaping wide open for the delightful pleasure of a startled and awe-struck garden gnome who just happened to visit you buck naked in your bedroom. Gosh n' stuff and grab the gnome.
And a big congrats to 'Bar Science' 'G', I'm sure you'll enjoy :) I shall now grace Bar Science with a visit from shy and humble me.
Take care Kelly and keep smiling :)

Rico Swaff said...

Lmao @ #3. Obviously the mistletoe replacement prompted people to do more than just "kiss."

Funny as always. I randomly stumbled on someone else's blog and they referenced you. Thought that was kind of cool. The Psycho Carnival is global man.

Rico Swaff said...

Lmao @ #3. Obviously the mistletoe replacement prompted people to do more than just "kiss."

Funny as always. I randomly stumbled on someone else's blog and they referenced you. Thought that was kind of cool. The Psycho Carnival is global man.

THE SNEE said...

Hi Kelly! Congrats on the cool blog award. I will be sure to check out both blogs that you mentioned. and my 11 year old are both Libras and bunny rabbits!!! That wonderful mix of balance, kindness, and hippity-hoppity. I'm glad to hear that your wife's ultrasound findings were ok. That must have been scary. I hope that the other medical issues you alluded to aren't too serious. My warmest thoughts to you and your wife. I know that health problems are never fun to manage. Be well friend, and maybe...just maybe... I'll fill in the 'I' for you-lol.

Anonymous said...

Oh no!! I hope #1 and #3 were in no way related!!! LOL!

Great post! You always make me laugh!

Kelly said...

G- Ya welcome, G. Glad you're stoked. Yeah, you'll have to think really hard to top my big ol' things. lol. I'm kidding, of course. I've done this so many times before, it's getting harder and harder to come up with new info. Hey, looking forward to seeing your ten things, though. Take care.

Kelly said...

klahanie- Yeah, I remember you saying that about the award. And yes, she does have a keen eye for talent and thanks for the compliments. And thanks for the the kind wishes for my wife and I. And you're very right about me writing posts that are sometimes at incredible odds with what's happening in my life outside the blog. Sometimes I'll let off it off my chest in a post. Sometimes not. Depends on how I feel. This month I wanted the posts to be, for the most part, light-hearted and/or perverse. But even that isn't set in concrete. You keep that gnome away from my ass crack! The little bastard is your responsibility! In return, I'll do you the favor of keeping the G.I. Joe doll locked up in a POW camp cage- so he won't pack your fudge while you're asleep. lol. Golly. Go in peace, Friend Gary, to the road less traveled and stuff. Whatever that means. Take care, dude.

Kelly said...

Rico Swaff- I think you might have something there about that "mistletoe" theory. :) Yeah, that is cool about that blog referencing me. Heh heh. Psycho Carnival... global? Why... I'm not surprised at all. I'm just too great and stuff. lol. And modest as hell, too. I'll be over to your blog soon, man. I took a quick look today and I like the new look of your blog, btw.

Kelly said...

THE SNEE- Thank you, Rebecca. It's always nice when that happens. That is an odd coincidence about your child and me both being Libras and bunny rabbits. And you're right about that description you gave about both of those signs. Especially the 'hippity-hoppity'. lol. ??? Thanks for the well wishing on my wife's health. I can tell you this without elaborating too much. Her legs are incredibly swollen. But the medication seems to be working gradually. Now moving on to something completely different and lighter... I desperately need you to fill in what comes after 'I'. I'm gonna go bonkers for banjos. AAAAH! Take care now, Rebecca. :)

Kelly said...

The Minute Man's Wife- I hope so, too. The most overwhelming thing I remember that night was not remembering a damn thing what had happened after I crashed. My friends were a mischievous lot. Always doing the most disciple shit you would never believe. To each other. To whoever. Hopefully nothing alive was violated.

I'm not bragging here when I say I was their "inspirational leader". lol.

Thanks for the compliment and award.

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