This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Friday, March 12, 2010

Computer Fire and Repair

After seeing smoke rolling out of both ends of my CPU, Sunday and nearly having a stroke, I figured that my computer was completely trashed. I took it to the computer repair shop and told them to call me and give me an estimate on labor and parts before doing anything to it (if it was salvageable). If the cost was going to be too high, I would get the hard drive and other components out of it that wasn't damaged and chuck the rest in the dumpster or elsewhere.

Maybe one of Gary's wee folks at Klahanie could have used the burned out CPU casing as a new home. Who knows? I would definitely advise getting a air freshener in that scenario.

Three days slowly went by before I got a call from the repair shop. Before that, I was suffering some major computer usage withdrawals. Luckily, I had a five hour long porno DVD called "Fuck My Face!" to get me through the tough times for awhile. And by awhile, I mean ten minutes. I pulled it out after that. And by "pulling it out", I mean taking the movie out of the DVD player.

Porn DVDs are boring to me, anymore. Kinda icky, too. Close up shots of ass zits, droopy cunt flaps and suspicious looking blemishes or sores are a real turn off.

The human body, in general, is a real turn off if you think about it. But don't!

In reality, I filled in the computer void by reading books I meant to read, like two years ago and talking more to my wife. The first part worked. The second part... not so much. Turns out my wife's irresponsible sister was causing us some problems which I won't get into here.

As usual, I'm getting off topic (and not getting off on the previous porno topic). :-)

The computer repair guy said the power supply was toast, burned up and screwed, royally. Well, in so many words, he said that. Also, he explained that the cooling fan was trashed. Furthermore, the video card's capacitors were cooked. That, he said, was the reason I heard the loud popping noise before the fire and smoke occurred. He gave me an estimate of $142.00 for labor and parts. Since I can't afford another computer these days, for a variety of reasons, I gave him the go ahead with repairing the fucking thing.

Now the next day, when it was ready for pick up, he showed me the damaged parts and gave me some good news. He was able to find a used power supply back in his storage bin that would fit in the proper spot in my CPU. Dell computer parts, he had explained before, were tricky and often complicated to replace (especially since the Dell computer I have is five years old -which is considered ancient in computer techie world, apparently).

Because he was able to put in the slightly used power supply, the cost of everything dropped to eighty-nine dollars. Hooray. Happy ending, for once. I hooked the computer up and went through the nearly 100 emails that I had gotten since the fire. After the cruise and getting some major medical bills paid off and buying a hearing aid, at long last, I plan on having a custom built computer made for me. No Dell parts.

In the end, I would have to say I'm lucky. It could have been far worse. The apartment could have caught on fire and the "Fuck My Face" DVD would have been lost forever. So sad.

Not really. Lol.

And now, I must catch up on my favorite blogs. Ready. Set. Go!


Dark Slander said...

Welcome back! I was going to write a piece about and your computer problems later today. It was in the hope that some millionaire who gives random money away for good causes saw it and sent you 3 bucks.

I haven't been blogging much, you only missed two. I got lazy and was busy going through a stack of new literature my professor gave me.

Let the insanity continue.

Dark Slander said...

P.S. I've also decided you're the only one who likes my blogs, because you're the only one who comments any more. :P

klahanie said...

Hey Kelly,
So pleased to note that you may just have your computer problems resolved.
You started reading books? You started talking to the wife? Flippin' heck man, you must have been going through some serious computer withdrawal symptoms. Nice to know you pulled it out after watching ten minutes of 'Fuck My Face!' I can understand only watching 10 minutes of a DVD like that:-)
The 'wee folks' would have loved to have used your CPU casing as a new home. The garden gnome and the beautiful fairy princess wanted to have rampant, kinky sex in it. If fact, they hoped you would watch. They also wanna' know if you have any spare brownies:-)
Take it easy and happy blogging. With respect, Gary

Crazy Brunette said...

I think I totally need to borrow the 'Fuck my Face' DVD! I've never seen that one!!! Damnit! I thought I'd seen them all!

The Wolf said...

Good to hear your up and running again, now remember the USB drive is for devices like a printer or mouse, not your ding dong.........sheesh no wonder the machines will rise and try to kill us. If Arnie comes to my door looking for Sarah Conner, I'm sending him to your address. I'm glad the porno survived those things will be the new gold after the apocalypse said...

I guess this is perfect timing then for my first visit to your blog. Now knowing you should be up and running for, well who knows how long a computer lasts, especially a Dell with now used parts and a smelly box. But hell if it made it through a fire and you actually came to the conclusion that porn is not what it is cracked up to be(yes there are a few good analogies in there). I am happy to say hello and shall be back to learn more about the life and times of Kelly :-)

The Guy's Perspective said...

You are lucky. Actually that's wicked cheap!
To wipe my computer clean and reinstall everything it was close to $200! That sucked.
I guess the moral of the story is, it's expensive to get "wiped" in general. That's why I married a nurse. I'm preparing for what's to come.
Glad to have you back my man!!

Anonymous said...

Good to have you back in cyber-space,Kelly! And glad to hear you got lucky.... with your computer, that is. ;-)

Kelly said...

DarkSlander: Gosh, your intentions make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. 3 whole dollars? I do believe I'm going to stroke myself a Kelly shake and give it to a retarded racist to drink. They won't know the difference. I understand about your lack of posting. It's been a crazy month, so far, for us. The rest of the month will be nutty, too. I'm just now getting around to commenting back on this post. Let the insanity DIScontinue, please.

Also, don't think I'm the only one who likes your blog. Don't judge by how many comments you get. If you really want to know who's visiting and reading your stuff, get a couple tracking widgets like I've got. Either that or become a social networking whore like some bloggers. As for myself, I put into practice only a bit of both strategies. But I don't feel like promoting myself that much. The material should speak for itself. If anyone doesn't like it. Fuck 'em!

Kelly said...

klahanie/Gary: Yeah, I actually had to read books and talk to the wife. Talk about hardship. Golly. :)

Ha ha ha. I cracked up at your comment about the wee folk using my CPU casing for their wacky orgies. Sure, I'll be more than happy to watch. I love the live shows better than the pre-taped stuff. Heck, I might even participate if they say "Pretty please". Brownies, of course, shall be served promptly afterwards.

Take care!

CrazyBrunette: You may certainly borrow the "Fuck My Face" DVD. It may be a little hard to pry open the case, however, because of all the CRUST along the seam. I also have "Freaks Of Nature" volumes 1 & 2. These feature the man with the prick so big (16 inches) he actually has to put it in a specially made holster (no kidding). The man with the incredible elastic scrotum skin. He actually stretches it, covering the entirety of this chick's face. Midget perform, of course. No surprise, there, really. The three breasted woman. Women with 2 vaginas. Men with 2 dicks and much, much more. Fun for the whole family!

Kelly said...

The Wolf: Hey, I tried pushing my teensy peener in the USB port and Voila! It worked. Thanks for the idea, sir. Oh, wait a minute... I guess I should stop doing that. That's what made the computer go Boom in the first place. And yes, my porn collection will be so valuable after the apocalypse, I will be the King of Bartertown. Woohoo!

ManOverboard: Thanks for stopping by. And good news... my box no longer smells. I gave it a douche. Come back again. I'll be paying your site a visit as soon as I can.

Guy's Perspective: Yeah, glad to be back. Thanks! Agreed. It was cheap. I'm glad no data was lost. Even if it were, it wouldn't be much of a problem. I have everything backed up on 2 flash drives. You're lucky to be married to a nurse. You probably save on medical care in some cases. My mom was a nurse.

VineyardRoad: Thanks to you, as well. Yeah, I did get "lucky" with my computer. ;-) You can tell when your computer is having an orgasm. It will explode and catch on fire. Yipee. lol.

Pratik Gupta said...

Welcome Back kelly!! its good to know that you have got your comp back...I am pretty aware that how hard is it to loose the collection of selected porn, Home Tapes, Celebrity clips... :)

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