This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Your Blog Is Your Child

Everyone's blog is like their own child, really. Raising a kid, I would have to say, is sort of like the molding of your own blog to your own personal, satisfactory creation. Except a kid is a living breathing thing that has come into being from popping out of a woman's hoo hoo. That, I believe, is the technical term for a woman's vagina. A blog, on the other hand, does not breathe. Just thought I'd let you in on that secret. But there are comparisons that can be made.

Actually, this premise/theme would work well in a post on a blog- now that I think about it. And presto-change-o, here it is. I must be full of magic or something.

I think you nurture your own kid, feed it and help it the same way a blogger gives his own blog fresh posts, a new widget, or perhaps, a "better" blog layout or design now and then. Whatever process or project he or she is working on for their blog, some creators have more of a capacity to give it more of what it needs -like a parent with it's child.

Some bloggers use humor in a post so a somewhat serious subject is "easier to swallow" for those with limited mental abilities. I farted. Still, others in Blog World will use a dab of logic to justify a somewhat silly subject. Then you have your ravenous social networking harlots who promote their blogs until they're bug-eyed, crazed zombies feasting upon the flesh of a Kraken, a fearsome marine behemoth from Greek Mythology.

However, why put your desires or bloggers in categories? I just did but you shouldn't. What? I must apologize.

Be free. Be honest. And if you have a blog that it's only reason for existence on the net is to sell frozen chocolate covered poop on a stick to all the neighborhood kids from an ice cream truck, well, so be it. But I won't visit it. In fact, I might just have to devise a brown smear campaign against that worthless crappy blog. Give me a blog with real substance, and not excrement, any day of the week with the exception of Tuesday.

That's all I have for now. Got any ideas? No, not that. Besides that.

On the count of three, let's band together and scream really loud. One, two.....


Michael said...

This is scary. So if my blog is like a kid I'm thinking in twenty years or so, when I kick it out of the basement it is eventually going to return with a gaggle of bloglets in tow and ... ARGH!

See you at me place on Tuesday.

Kelly said...

That's very true, Michael, and when the blog does return, with bloglets in tow, you can say to one of the bloglets, "Hey there, kiddo, why don't ya sit on your grandpappy's lap and I'll tell ya the story of how I created your father and raised him to be a good and responsible blog -just like you'll become some day."

See you Tuesday. :-) Good to see you found a way to comment.

The Wolf said...

If my blog is a kid it's going to grow up to be the antichrist....and hey whats wrong with the shamless selling of poop on a stick to the neighbourhood kids. I offer three flavors, nutty corn, sorta chili, and mystery suprise all for a dollar a stick.......gotta fill a niche market somehow before Google gets it

Kelly said...

Ha ha. Wow, you are quite the salesman. Nutty corn and sorta chili sound delicious. Mystery surprise sounds frightening, however. Let me know when the business opens up, online or offline. I'll let you advertise your fine product here on PC for free. Don't let Google gobble it up.

And hey, if your blog is going to grow up to be the antichrist, wtf is mine going to grow up to be?

rusty said...

Excrement, that's a good blog right there. Anybody got a funnel?

Kelly said...

Hey Rusty, I've got the anus gravy and funnel if you got the mashed po-taters ready! Mmm-mmm!

klahanie said...

Hi Kelly,
I like your analogy. Or is that 'anal' ogy:-)
I kinda think of my blog as a well-behaved child with the occasional temper tantrum.
I originally started blogging on a community blog site. It was a site where a lot of the members had various mental health concerns. Based on that, I was really careful how I wrote stuff. Now that I'm just doing my own thing, I like to do lots of different stuff. On my own blog you may note that my comments back try to relate to how someone has responded to my blog.
When I visit other sites that are, shall we say, a tad wilder than mine...well I feel free to let it friggin' rip....
You know, if I read another goddam blog about how someone had such a wonderful time with their family at McDonalds..I think I'm gonna scream and leave obscenities on their site..not really.
Anyway dude, an excellent posting. Maybe we should do a blog about grammar anarchy. I get effin' tired of professional writers telling me what the right way to write is. I write what I write and you and these other awesome bloggers who visit your site; write whatever the hell they want. Fuck..I've I left a long comment.
With respect, Gary :-)

Kelly said...

Glad ya like the analogy, Gary. You were there when the idea first popped into my noggin', through my fingertips and then the keyboard at the Blog Catalog shout box. And presto-change-o... here it is. I wish I could stop saying that. :)

I can see why you think of your blog that way. I've always liked the way your blog posts bring light hearted humor and fantasy (wee folk, fairies, etc.) into the mix. Of course, there are more dimensions than that to it. Just giving a few examples and a little opinion. I farted.

I think all bloggers bring a piece of themselves to display in every post. Some, like the uptight grammar police blogs, mommy blogs, selling stuff blogs and dragging-your-ass dull kind of blogs, I would rather not visit or see their piece.

I can see why you had to be careful with members, that you knew, had mental health problems. You would have to be somewhat delicate. I know I would be. I know what they're going through so I very much empathize. I think it's great now that you're doing your own thing, creating your child (blog) and saying what you want.

Feel free to say what you want, here too. :-) Get wild!

Now look who's leaving long ass comments. Ha ha. Take care, friend.

Crazy Brunette said...

Well, I can safely say I know EXACTLTY what my blog 'child' would grow up to be...

ME! So it would be FUCKING bad ass okay??

Uuuum, check out my newest post! I MAY have mentioned you... Possibly...

Kelly said...

I believe you. I believe you. It would grow up to be fucking bad ass. Geesh, don't break my freakin' arm if I don't announce it to the peeps, already!

Well, by damned, you did possibly mention me and possibly gave me an award. Hmmm... What's that I see to the right?

Crazy Brunette said...

I knew you'd fucking loooooove it!

Pratik Gupta said...


Totally right on target post....

The Guy's Perspective said...

The one thing writing a blog has over kids is that you have much more control. Somehow these damn kids got a mind of their own. I have no idea how that happened. I tried my best to brainwash them but to no avail.

Kelly said...

Pratik Gupta: Thanks, dude! I thought you would say FOUR! :)

The Guy's Perspective: That's a good point -about your ability to control your blog vs. controlling your kid. But, I ask you, who does society blame when your kid or your blog becomes uncontrollable? It seems they always blame the parent(s), even if it's the dog's fault. What???

Anonymous said...

Dear Psycho,

Swell place you got, here.

So, I should constitute my writing with substance, rather than poop-covered popsicles? Is that quite what you suggested? I shall deliver your requests to my secretary and see what she can bang out (so-to-speak).

Now, as for your little funhouse, here, I feel comfortable saying sincerely that it is full of fuck.

Nice place to visit; I'll harangue you again soon. Pleased to make your acquaintance, nutjob.

Cheese and Crackers,


Kelly said...

BothEyes: Thanks. Stop by, anytime. Is your secretary going to bang out poop covered poopsicles? If so, I suggest you offer the idea to your favorite ice cream company.

I see you stopped by Sy's place at "Wheel is Turning...". He is my Brother in Insanity.

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