This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Sunday, January 9, 2011

To Do Notes For Today


Gorilla Bananas said...

I'm glad you fart around the same time you pet the cat. I don't see the point in having pets unless you can fart in their faces and watch their reaction. A really loyal cat would pretend to like the smell.

klahanie said...

A day in the life of Kelly. A witty and yet, bittersweet post.
Did I mention I went to my bedroom in the dark, one night and forgot I rearranged the bedroom? Most painful flinging yourself onto a bed that isn't there.
Look after yourself and know you have my ongoing support and friendship.

Lana Gramlich said...

At least you're honest. *L*

THE SNEE said...

Post-it stories! Kelly, you're definitely onto the next big thing. Your wife is lucky that you make her dinner, pet the cat and tuck her in. With everything that you go through, you have an amazing sense of humor! I must remind myself to follow in your good footsteps that way.

Kelly said...

Gorilla Bananas- Why that's one of the main reasons you own a pet, is it not? So that you can queef or fart in their faces and test their reactions? If they lick their lips, it means it will be partly cloudy over the weekend. If they crinkle their nose, that means God loves you very much and wants you to make love to a pineapple.

Kelly said...

klahanie- No, you didn't mention that story, Gary. When you flung yourself onto a bed that wasn't there, where did you land? The floor? The fifth dimension? In the middle of a Teletubbie orgy?

Seriously, though, my sister and I have been having hard times with the "Dad situation". Incredibly, it keeps getting worse in ways that would surprise pretty much anyone. I thank you for your support, of course, and I still want to let you know some things by email but it's hard to write about it.

Kelly said...

Lana Gramlich- Yeah, sometimes I'm honest to a fault. Whenever possible, I try to find the humor in my life.

klahanie said...

I ended up smashing the left side of my head and left leg on a wardrobe that I forgot had also been moved.
I then had a surreal experience of having group sex with a bunch of Munchkins.
Okay buddy, by all means, email when you are comfortable in doing so.
Peace, Gary

Kelly said...

THE SNEE- The Post-it way of doing it is pretty cool, isn't it? You should tell the wife she is lucky in that respect.

What I'm going through now is really really bad. I try to keep some humor about it. As so happens so many times during writing this blog, a part of me wants to say exactly what I'm going through. Then the other part finds it hard to write about it.

I find it heartening that you wish to follow in my footsteps in finding the humor in things that are difficult. Take care, Rebecca.

Kelly said...

klahanie- Wow. That was a quick comment back. I'm still replying to comments from other folks right at this moment. Cool. And thanks.

Sounds like you did some real damage to yourself. I figured you were just going to say you landed face first on the floor- which would be bad enough. Did the sex with the Munchkins magically heal your wounds? I know. I'm a bastard.

I'll try, once again, to email you tonight. Take care.

klahanie said...

"Did the sex with the Munchkins magically heal your wounds? I know. I'm a bastard."
Yes you are a bastard LOL
Sadly, the Munchkins group sex did not magically heal my wounds. Although I did note some dog named 'Toto' (not to be confused with the band 'Toto' who were actually, at one time, the back up musicians for Boz Scaggs)tried to take a chomp out of my butt. Bad Toto!
No worries on the email. I think I'd better 'crash' out, correction, go to bed. Note to self, 'remember where you placed your bed...'

Kelly said...

klahanie- Thanks for the return comment, Gary. lol... Yeah, I remember the band Toto. Maybe Toto the dog made a half-assed attempt at chomping your butt- but, you farted at just that critical moment, causing Toto to puke, keel over and pass out.

Have a good 'crash' or sleepytime and I hope you remember where the bed is tonight. Later, dude.

LilPixi said...

Kelly, you're so good to the Mrs. =)
Love the post-it notes.
Them cats, it's like they're trying to trip you I swear. I mean, they don't give a shit about the risk of being trampled. They just figure eight around our legs like "I'm gonna make you fall, mofo. I want some fucking sushi." Gotta love em'.

Great to-do list!! lol

Kelly said...

LilPixi- I try to be. I'm not perfect by any means. Neither is she. But love is the glue that binds.

It seems my cat is trying to trip me all the time. I know he wants to be around my feet, especially in the kitchen, because he wants me to give him a treat. Yeah, he said those exact words to me one morning... "I'm gonna make you fall, mofo. I want some fucking sushi." So I gave my cat turkey, instead. I said, "Eat that, mofo, and get happy 'bout it" lol.

Greg said...

Love the post it note post idea, really cool, fast and easy to read.

You are truly good to your wife, i notice thought that you refrain from farting when she's around, and also noticed that you fart around the cats. Could explain why they want to to trip you?

Gives me the shivers every-time you write about injecting yourself with a needle, you are truly a tough cookie!

Within every hardship is a funny story, that's the way I see it.

Kelly said...

Greg- Yeah, it's pretty easy to do. But don't get me wrong. The wife and I fart on each other when we're in bed at night. It kinda sets the mood for romance, you know. But you could be right about the cat tripping me because I fart in his face sometime. Maybe he doesn't see it as a gesture of love for him. I don't know.

Yeah, stickin' the insulin needle in the ol' belly and thigh twice a day suck quite greatly. I don't recommend it... unless you have to do it. Thanks for the "cookie" comment. Tis true. You have to laugh when things are their toughest or you'll cry. Or go completely mad. That last one has already happened.

bazza said...

Wow, we took a reality check inside your life. As my late Irish mudder-in-law used to say, "Blimey O'Reilly!"
I agree with The Snee - you may have started the next big thing with post-it notes. Very creative, top marks!

Donda said...

Sounds like my day except I have to use a spoon with my needles BAHAHAAH

Kelly said...

bazza- Yeah, the reality isn't too dandy, here in the Land O' Kelly. Blimey O' Reilly, indeed. Yeah, Dad is giving us fits. We're trying to keep him safe and he keeps going against our efforts- in so many different ways.

'Mudder-in-law'... heh heh. Yeah, I thought the post-it notes would be a cool way to do a post on the blog. I can give you the website url, if you want it, where you can make your own up and do the same thing. And thanks for the compliment.

Kelly said...

Donda- WOW-WEE GA-ZOWY is all I can say about that! I use my spoon to eat Cheerios, myself. lol. Take care, Donda.

kerrie said...

HI Sir Kelly
glad to see petting cats and farty all come associated with blogging...
they all provide a certain sort of creative relief which requires tracksuit trousers, late nights and need to find something rediculous out something ordinary

Kelly said...

kerrie- Have I been knighted and not informed? lol.

Yes, petty kitties and farting on them is all a part of the grand and majestic world of blogging. Your last statement is true, as well. Not only do attempt to find the ridiculous out of something ordinary but I try my hand at picking the comic out of the tragic. Hence the word, tragicomic.

I shall be galloping along, upon my trusty steed, while suited with shiny armor to your site here in a sec. Take care.

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