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This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Monday, November 8, 2010

How Flexible Are You?

So the question I pose to you now, gentle reader, is this:

How flexible are you?

Which of these positions could you put yourself into?


EXAMPLE A


EXAMPLE B


EXAMPLE C


EXAMPLE D


EXAMPLE E


EXAMPLE F


OR... EXAMPLE G


32 comments:

Gucci Mama said...

I cannot understand why someone would want feet that close to their mouths. Even if the feet are their own. Yikes.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Quite right, Miss Gucci. I use my feet to scratch my back, but always feed myself with my fingers. As for those positions, I've probably done most of them without even noticing.

The Wolf said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Wolf said...

Damm computer screwed up on me....fucking machines will be the death of us all. Anyways what I originally wrote is that the real question Kelly isin't if you can bend into those positions, but if you can get out of them without breaking something important or looking like you spent you're entire life looking for you're baseball.

LilPixi said...

Unfortunately, I SO wish I was very flexible, but the reality is that every bone in my body cracks like a damn 90 y/o lady, to the point where I thought I'd maybe have to call 911 this past summer to get me out of my garden after bending weird.

I'm f-ed on being flexible. 28 y/o granny gonna brake a hip.

LilPixi said...

Break a hip. Wow, that was awful.
Brake for retardation.

Lucky, flexible, sex ninja bastards!

klahanie said...

Okay, finally, the photos in question, have loaded up.
Being a flexible kinda' guy,I had time to go for a dump, make a cup of coffee, whistle songs from West Side Story and type out this comment.
Well, anyhow, to answer your vitally important question, I'd like to be able to do like the dude in Example B is doing. Always wanted to have a right, up close and personal sniff of my ass, or 'arse' as they say in Britain.
Have a good day, eh:-)

The Fabulous Sir Tom Eagerly said...

I say Kelly old boy, you couldn't fix me up with Miss Example C could you? I got something I'd like to show her.
Am I an old rascal Kelly?
I think perhaps I may be.
Cheers!

Papa K said...

Wow dude. Whoever said that flexibility was over rated was terribly wrong...

Thanks for visiting my site brother. Your site is quite a riot as well....

vineyardroad.com said...

Ha.. Ha... lovely. By that of course, I mean the comments posted here! ;-) The article in question..? Well... I'll have to think on that!

MartyrMom said...

YIKES!!! and I thought I was good cause I can still do the splits!!
sigh........

Kelly said...

Gucci Mama- Me neither. I hate feet. Even my own. There should be a law against feet.

Kelly said...

Gorilla Bananas- I usually feed myself by having the cat chew my food for me and regurgitating down into my throat like a birdy.

Kelly said...

The Wolf- I know. I hate computers, too... and Blogger... and Blog Catalog... and Farcebook. None of it is worth a shit, really. One or the other is always fuckin' up. Yet, here we are, typing away into oblivion. Must be the sense of community or some shit, eh?

I'd be afraid of getting my elbow stuck in my sphincter if I tried any of these positions. Then what would I tell the neighbors?

Kelly said...

LiliPixi- Hahaha... Goddamn! I feel for ya. Your bone structure (or lack of it) must be like Rice Krispies cereal*

*Snap, Crackle and Pop!

But just think, when you get to be my age, you'll be twice as fucked up. Now you have something to look forward to, eh? Tee hee.

I wouldn't be too envious of those female sex ninjas. One of these days, they're gonna get one of their feet stuck in their Hoo-Has and then they'll be sad.

Kelly said...

klahanie- Like I was telling The Wolf... Blogger and all the rest are just dandy as fuck, aren't they? Well, as long as you didn't make the coffee out of your dump as you whistled West Side Story tunes from your anus, while making your comment- then I think you did a fine job of using your waiting time wisely.

Not only could you sniff your own asshole in Position B, but you could give yourself a jaunty knob slob, too. What fun!

I'm bad. Take care, Gary. :)

Kelly said...

The Fabulous (?) Sir Tom Eagerly- Well, now... I believe someone's getting a swollen head over themselves ever since they received a certain commenter's award. I'm not naming names but-

Sure, I'll hook you right up with Example C. I know her personally, after all. And I know what you want to show her, by the way. You want to show her that fancy-shmancy award you won not long ago, huh?

Cheers, you old rascal!

Kelly said...

Papa K.- Hey dude, welcome to the party! I agree with ya on your flexibility point. There's just something about a woman pointing her barely concealed camel toes toward Heaven that kinda just gets to ya in your nether regions, huh?

Boing!

Donda said...

I have actually done #2 before. It was totally accidental. I was singing karaoke and slipped on some spilled beer but that should count for something, right???

Kelly said...

vineyardroad.com- Hi Penny! Isn't the human body just a lovely thing? Especially when it's contorted into pretzel-like fucked up shapes? Glad you stopped by. Did you bring the booze? It's your turn, you know.

Kelly said...

MarytrMom- Scary, aren't they? I know what you mean about being more flexible in your younger years. Hell, anymore, I'm afraid to cross my legs for fear of busting my balls open from the shear weight of my thighs.

Pop.

Kelly said...

Donda- You score high points with me for being able to do that, drunk or not. As long as none of the inebriated fellas in the bar thought you were inviting them for, let's say... "shaningans" in that position.

bazza said...

It seems like you're back to normal and, as always, very entertaining. Sir Tom, and your replies, crack me up too!
I (nearly) always come away from this site with a smile.

vineyardroad.com said...

Kelly! Shame on you for even thinking you have to ask if I brought the booze... I ALWAYS bring the booze!! Pshhh.
Maybe wifey hid it on you... she and I are planning a girls night.. lol.

Kelly said...

bazza- Yeah, I'm feeling better. Dad and I made up, from things said and done during the moving fiasco in September, so that made a big difference. Glad you come away with a smile.

Kelly said...

vineyardroad.com- That's true about the booze. You do always bring it. I apologize. I can just imagine you and my wifey having a girls night out. That would be a hoot. She loves to drink, too. Me, on the hand... Well, I'm more of a smoker.*

*wink

Take care.

THE SNEE said...

Hi Kelly, I'd like to think that I'm typing out this comment with one leg wrapped around my neck in a knot and the other foot sharing the typing load with my hands that sometimes fatigue from hen and pecking...Just kidding about the hen and pecking part....I actually did very well in my feet typing class. Great fun to be had here at Psycho Carnival always! Thanks for the visuals...I'm feeling much more flexible about everything now!

Kelly said...

THE SNEE- Hi Rebecca, there's nothing more pleasing to me than knowing that a lady is thinking that she's tying herself up in knots and pretzel shapes just to type this comment out (with her foot). And really, I think that's everyone's dream, to be able type with their feet, isn't it? If I could, I think I'd be toe-tapping my way to stardom and making mucho dinero on the sideshow circuit.

I believe ya when you say you did very well in feet typing class. You are to be commended and someday you shall be rewarded for your excellent efforts.

Glad ya had a dandy time here at PC and you're most welcome for the visuals. And, of course, thank you for bending over backwards (or something) to comment. :)

Take care,

Kelly

Dark Slander said...

My answer... not flexible enough ;)

Kelly said...

Dark Slander- Me neither. :)

faj9778 said...

IS VERY GOOD..............................

Kelly said...

faj9778- Not sure, exactly, what you're referring to, but thanks, nonetheless. :)

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