This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Fun Things You Can Do By Yourself

Discovering fun stuff to do when you are alone can open up a world of possibilities that will help you find out more about yourself. Listed below are various ways to cheer yourself up and/or relief boredom that are usually affordable. Ways that don't involve your ever reliable computer. Ways that might require you to actually raise your sweaty buttocks from the chair you find yourself in. Depending on how deeply attached you are to the computer, the task of separating yourself from it, alone, may kill a few hours.

Try any of the following activities or combination of activities:

Take a walk outside
Go for a drive or a ride on a bus
Read a book
Listen to music
Watch a movie
Build a birdhouse


Create a painting
Exercise
Create a song
Dance merrily, barefoot, on broken glass
Volunteer
Hypnotize yourself
Masturbate
Eat a bug
Plant a tree
Take a shower (you could use one)
Cut off your hand
Accept yourself for who you are
Kiss yourself in the mirror
Try to invent something using only the following: a sheet of aluminum foil, a rubber band, a paper clip and a decapitated head
Take a trip to another place in your mind and then get up and go there
Make plans to go skydiving
Get outside, look up at the stars and shout
Stick a carrot up your rectum
Meditate
Choose wisely (or else don't)
Ask yourself a question and quickly answer it before you can think of another question
Create a card trick
Fantasize
Go to a museum
Cook something (Start with water and work your way up)
Go to a park
Organize stuff
Conquer a fear
Roll your eyes to the back of your head and scream
Try your hand at flagpole climbing
Go to sleep
Pretend that you're riding a wild bull, while yelling, "Yeeha!"
Put as many articles of clothing on that you have in your house and let yourself roll down a flight of stairs
Set up a tent in one of your rooms and act as if you're camping (Don't forget to bring marshmallows!)
Put on a helmet and run full speed into a wall
Tell yourself a bawdy or cheesy joke
Laugh- just for the heck of it

22 comments:

LilPixi said...

I might have just listed "masturbate" about 20 times over. The last time I set up camp in my living room with marshmallows was, sadly, the last time I had a living room. Nobody told me to exclude the bonfire.

Seriously, though, I LOVE this!!
I'm a really crafty person (I try to be an active one, too) & I love to keep busy & as happy in my own lil world as I can be. This post shall help me delve deeper into those possibilities.

And there are a few things I'd like to say about that bird house but don't know where to begin. lol

Anonymous said...

From the rather lovely, award-winning Sir Tom Eagerly:
There are several things on that list that Sir Tom has actually done. I will not go in detail old chap but I will say that no carrots were harmed during the practice.
Good Day to you, Sir!

billy pilgrim said...

thanks for all the tips. i happen to be all alone at the moment and might spend the day trying to figure out which suggestion best fits my limited talents.

Kelly said...

LilPixi- I was tempted to list masturbate 20 times but I didn't want to be held responsible for somebody's Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. lol. Oh Noes! Your living room caught burnt down due to innocent campfire bonfire? Someone should pay for this! Obama must be to blame for this atrocity! He makes a good scapegoat for everything, ya know. Republicans are giving me a thumbs up on this. Hey, seriously, glad you love the post. It was a spur of the moment type post. Yeah, I tell tell you're crafty by what you've said on Twitter, your blog and other Internet avenues. Plus, I could tell, anyway. I admire your creativity! I know what you'd like to say about that bird house, too. Naughty, naughty, LilPixi. :) Take care!

Kelly said...

Sir Tom Eagerly- My bet would be that you have masturbated, with carrots up your bum, while running full speed into a wall. It seems difficult but doable. So how was it for you? Please go into details. I'm writing a book, thanks to Bazza. Good day to you, Sir, as well.

Kelly said...

billy pilgrim- You are most welcome for the tips. Cutting off your hand while creating a song sounds like it would be a good time- but- no pressure, man. You could go with masturbating and running full speed into a brick wall, as well. These are just gentle suggestions to pass the time away, my friend.

The Wolf said...

Good suggestions I have a few of my own that can help relive bordem

1. Tie a 20 dollar bill to a string and go homeless fishing

2. Pick up a hooker (that's always an adventure in itself)

3. Cow tipping

4. Midget tossing


5 Walk the earth like Kang from Kung Fu

6. Burn things because the leprichaun tells you to do so

7. Go to a strip club

8. Snipe people from a high office tower

9. Masterbate with sand paper

10. Fuck a sheep

Kelly said...

The Wolf- Those are also dandy suggestions. I love 'homeless fishing' and try to do it every other Saturday afternoon. Oh, how they all come up and give that 20 dollar bill the nibbles. Personally, I'd enjoy walking the earth like Kang while masturbating with sand paper, then topping it all off with running head first into a brick wall.

bazza said...

Hi Kelly. I'm happy to learn that you are writing a book - be careful though, Sir Tom might want royalties. I dread to think which items from the list he has tried!
Some of the stuff is pretty cool.
Bazza’s Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

Kelly said...

bazza- lol. Well, I might have fibbed a teensy bit on the book writing. Maybe someday. I'm afraid the only thing Sir Tom will get from me is my hearty thanks and a pie made of spooge. I can only imagine what that rascal has done from the list. But, for now, I'm going to close my eyes and push those images out of my head.

Take care, Bazza

TheHarvester said...

funniest thing: masterbating.

THE SNEE said...

Collect sticks and build a bonfire; Start seeds indoors with the hopes that maybe just maybe the snow might melt by May; Go to a dairy farm and learn to milk a cow. Consider making cheese with milk. Thanks for the LAUGHS Kelly, and good ideas of course.

klahanie said...

Hey Kelly,
Well dude, I've got to 'hand' it to you with this posting. Although light-hearted, zany as fuck and truly hilarious, you do bring up an underlying serious point.
For, positive distractions are just the tonic for a case of the blues, or in my case, overwhelming isolation.
Dude, you know how melancholy I've been lately, and this posting has been a real pick me up. Thanks for this, my friend. Laughter, is indeed the best medicine.
Right then, must go and have a good jerking session. Whoops...too late...what the hell is that creamy stuff on my keyboard...
Cheers dude and may you have a peaceful, positive weekend.
Your buddy, Gary :)

G said...

The great thing about this modern era is that, even after lifting you arse off the couch and going out and seeing the real world, you can still check in the the internet courtesy of your ever present smart phone or tablet PC...

Kelly said...

The Harvester- And what makes it's so great is that it's even affordable enough for the hobos behind the McDonald's dumpster.

Kelly said...

THE SNEE- I like those ideas, Rebecca. Very practical. I'd really like to know how to make cheese with milk. I'm afraid the last time I went to the farm to milk a cow, I accidentally milked a bull instead. The milk kinda tasted funny for some reason. :)

Yeah, if I were you, I'd try anything at this point to get the snow to melt. Did you know... even as I write this... It's snowing here now? I thought we were done with it all. Eegads! Where's yours and mine danged Spring?

Kelly said...

klahanie- lol... Yeah, in fact you and I just did a little positive distracting over on Farcebook. I know you've been in the World of Melancholy, as of late and I'm glad I could cheer you up. You're welcome, too. You be sure to have a nice, wholesome jerking session, now, and hope everything COMES out OK for you. :)

Hope the remainder of your weekend is peaceful and you're able to cheer up- if only for a few moments here and there, at least. Take care, dude.

Kelly said...

G- Yes, you can bring all your electronic gadgets with you while getting out. That's another way of doing it. Not my way... but it's another certainly another option. But let us not forget the many joys of furiously wanking and running head first into a brick wall. :)

kerrie said...

thankyou for you suggestions I was wondering what to do with the four carrots in my fridge

Anonymous said...

I think if I looked up at the stars and shouted, "Stick a carrot up your rectum" the neighbors might start asking questions again.

Kelly said...

kerrie- You're welcome. Just know, Kerrie, I cannot be held, in any way responsible, for the loss of those carrots should they make a "colonic journey", so to speak and can't find their way back. :) Awww... poor lil' carrots... can't find their way back home. :(

Kelly said...

The Minute Man's Wife- Then the next thing you know, doing that will catch on in your neck of the woods, become a nationwide fad and they'll all attribute it to you and then you'll be famous and you'll get your own Reality TV show and...

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