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This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Stomach Pump Surprise

I was perusing the net, attempting find a decent recipe for risotto, when I stumbled upon some recipes that seemed to require a stomach pump after consuming the cuisine. For your enjoyment, I kept a few of them to display to those of you with the more discriminating palette.


BEAVER IN SOUR CREAM

1 Beaver, skinned and cleaned
1 ts Salt
1/2 c Vinegar
1/4 ts Paprika
1 tb Salt
1/4 c Butter
2 qt Water
1 md Onion, sliced
2 ts Soda
1/2 c Water
1/2 c Flour
1 c Sour cream

1. Soak beaver overnight in solution of 1/2 cup vinegar and 1 tablespoon salt in cold water to cover.
2. The next day, remove the beaver from the brine, wash and cover with solution of 2 teaspoons soda to 2 quarts of water. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer 10 minutes.
3. Drain and rinse beaver and cut into serving pieces.
4. Dredge each piece of meat thoroughly in the seasoned flour.
5. Melt butter in a heavy fry pan and brown the pieces of meat.
6. Transfer meat to a greased casserole, slice onions over top, add water and bake at 325 degrees F. until tender.
7. When meat is almost tender, add 1 cup sour cream to the casserole. Stir well and continue cooking until tender. Serves 4.

Yes, but, where can I go to find fresh beaver? Oh, dam!



The following dish could be described as both a hearty desert and tasty entree.


TUNA TWINKIE SOUFFLE

1 Tbl rendered chicken fat, divided
12 Hostess Twinkies
Salt
White Pepper
1/2 tsp dry mustard
4 eggs, separated
2 cans tuna in oil, drained, reserve oil

Preheat oven to 350 F

Grease a 7-inch soufflé dish with 1 tsp of chicken fat and 1 tsp tuna oil. Slice Twinkies in half lengthwise. Remove and reserve cream filling. In a large food processor, combine Twinkie cakes, half of the Twinkie filling, and the remaining chicken fat and tuna oil.

Blend until the mixture has reached the consistency of a thin batter. Transfer ingredients to a medium saucepan and cook over low heat. Stir in salt, white pepper, and mustard. Remove from heat. Beat in egg yolks, one at a time, beating thoroughly after each addition. Fold in tuna. In a medium bowl, beat egg whites until stiff but not dry. Fold beaten egg whites into tuna mixture. Pour into greased soufflé dish. Bake in 350 oven 40 to 45 minutes, or until puffed and golden brown. Top with remaining Twinkie cream.

Serve with a tossed salad.
Including the tossed salad in with this meal ensures that you'll be engaging in healthy eating.


Weird Ant Brood Tacos Recipe

Ingredients:

2 Tablespoons Butter
1/2 Pound Ant Larvae and Pupae
3 Serrano Chilies, raw , finely chopped
1 Tomato
finely chopped Pepper
1 handful Cilantro, Chopped
Taco Shells

To Serve Procedure: Heat the butter in a frying pan and fry the larvae or pupae. Add the chopped onions, chilies, and tomato, and season with salt. Sprinkle with ground pepper, cumin, and oregano, to taste. Serve in tacos and garnish with cilantro.

Eeeeeeeeeew, that sounds spicy.


NORTH CAROLINA CANKER WORM SORBET
And finally, a delicious desert to top it all off.

1 cup canker worms- toasted, this can be done in the oven at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 20 minutes turning half way through.

Canker worms should be gathered in the early spring before April 10th otherwise they become too large and tough. Be sure to remove all silk threads they use for dropping from the trees as these impart a bitter taste.

2 cups of tomato juice
1 egg white
1 tbsp of tomato paste
Juice of 2 limes
½ cup sugar
1 cup of water
6 tbsp minced basil leaves
Fresh basil leaves for garnish
Salt and pepper to taste
Dash of Tabasco, if desired
3 oz Vodka

In a bowl, lightly beat the egg white. Whisk in the tomato juice, tomato paste, canker worms, lemon juice, sugar, basil, salt, pepper and cayenne pepper. Transfer the mixture to an ice-cream machine and freeze according to manufacturer's directions. Scoop the mixture into serving dishes and garnish with the canker worms and basil leaves. Serve the sorbet with a dash of Vodka.

Hope these recipes whet your appetite, everyone!

4 comments:

Sy said...

Everyone loves a good tasty beaver dont they?

Drowsey Monkey said...

Eeesh...good think I use my stove as a storage space.

Hey, I like your spokesman, LOL!

J. Alden Page said...

Is it strange if some of those sound appealing to me?

I would seriously like to taste both the ant tacos and the beaver.

Kelly said...

Golly, comments aplenty!

Sy: Yes, it's true, everyone luvs a good beaver. 'Specially when it's covered with whipped cream. Heh heh heh heh. Damn mind! In the gutter again!

Drowsey: You mean you don't cook? At all? Even for your cats? Glad you like my spokesman for PC. I wonder where I got that idea from. Hhhhhmmmm. Thanks, D.

Mr. Page: Yes, it is wildly bizarre of you to even contemplate eating a taco filled with ants or a creamed beaver. But since I enjoy almost all things BIZARRE, I give you a freaky thumbs up.

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