This site is a testament to not only my life but to the insanity of society. Dive into Psycho Carnival and you'll find tragicomic personal stories, wild yet honest rants, a little depravity, videos and a buttload of other goodies.

This site also contains adult like humor and ideas that could make you think. Consider yourself warned!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Saw me silly

Hey Bitches! This is Mrs. Pickle. I am back down on my knees while typing another guest post for Kelly.

So last night my husband and I were bored and surfing the web. We typed in the words “Sex toys gone wrong” and we found some great things. My favorite one though was an article we found. Allow me to explain.

Apparently some dumb Bitch who is 27 in Maryland was feeling the need to be sexually stimulated. I get it, really I do! Here is where she is different from the rest of us though. Her idea of being sexually stimulated involves a Sawzall. I know right! I was excited also when I found out!

For those of you who do not know what a Sawzall is, I included a picture. Now keep in mind this blade once plugged in goes back and forth like a jackhammer. So she probably thought she was in for a real treat.





So apparently this woman thought it would be a good idea to slide a sex toy over the Sawzall and fuck it. Because really, who doesn’t want to fuck a saw? Naturally, her masturbation session did not go as she would have hoped. And yes I would have paid money to be there and be a witness.

I would have told the doctors, “Well, she was horny! Give the woman a break okay?” The doctor would have been like “How long was she masturbating with the saw before it lacerated her vagina region?” I would have said, “ Well she was doing just fine and getting all wet, but once it got to about 7 seconds into it she started to notice this sharp pain and that is when she started screaming “ UNPLUG IT! UN PLUG THE FUCKING SAW!” I am sorry doctor, I did not unplug it as fast as she would have liked, because I had to go and grab my camera.”

The article then goes on to say that she was rushed to the hospital. The sex toy was still attached. They say she was released and is at home now recovering from being fucked by a saw her injuries.

Personally, I would love to meet this woman. If I had the choice to either see Cher naked (Because I am still not convinced she has a vagina) or to interview Mrs. Sawzall, I would have to go with the 2nd. Because I have so many questions and I want answers damnit!









Like I said, I am Mrs. Pickle. If you like what you see come check out my blog. Picklesinmyass.blogspot.com.

19 comments:

Dazee Dreamer said...

oh my freaking hell. some people are really stupid shits.

The Wolf said...

When I read this Darwin's theory of evolution came to mind....the dumb ones will always find a way to kill themsevles off. On the plus side at least she didn't use a chainsaw

Lana Gramlich said...

*LOL!* I read a story once about a guy who inadvertently electrocuted himself using 2 belt sanders. I can't imagine being the one to find him...like his family was.

PryON said...

It was a brilliant idea at the time.

Pickleope said...

Does that mean I should abandon my quest to patent the orbital sander taint tickler?

Lost.in.Idaho said...

They sell toys LIKE this, but it takes a special person to use an actual saw to do it.

Darwin 1, this chick 0.

jonaldson said...

You are absolutely right. Cher has a weiner.

Erika said...

omg, that is GENIUS!!!

Why have I never thought of that before??

Thanks for the great tip!!

Geoffrey said...

Still she probably got some time with the sex toy still on. I'd love to ask - was it worth it?

Mrs. Pickle said...

Of course it was worth it Geoffrey!

Dave said...

Ooooooo the mind boggles lol. I suppose it was a good idea while it lasted lol. I'll be back to this Blog most defo lol.

Kelly said...

Gosh, I never thought about using an electric saw to masturbate with. Mrs. Pickle- What a terrific idea. But first, I think I'll pour acid right on my balls first- before I use that saw. The sulfuric acid can act as my lube. What fun!

What another hilarious true tale you given with wonderful descriptions that warm the heart and tickle my funny boner. It's amazing what some humans will do to get off.

Sometimes they get off and get dead, too, in return. Like actor David Carridine, from the movie, Kill Bill. Thanks again for another humorous post regarding dumb asses and they extremes they go to pleasure themselves. Great post!

Kelly said...

AND HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND, EVERYONE! (no one should use saws, of any type, as a sexual aid or plaything the next two days)

Elliot MacLeod-Michael said...

Reminds me of the time i stuck my dick in the garbage disposal. I thought it would go well, but not so much.

Mrs. Pickle said...

@ Elliot,

Um... next time you do that, can you please take pictures?

DocStout said...

The last few comments remind me of an old joke... You hear the one about the guy who got fired when he was caught with his dick in the pickle slicer?

... Yeah, apparently her father owns the factory.

Alphabeta said...

Yikes!

Ally said...

I just threw up. People are so sick and stupid at the same time.

PorkStar said...

Holy crap!! I dont doubt this for a second, i know and have seen on video some of this crazy shit.

Related Posts with Thumbnails

  © Blogger template ProBlogger Template by Ourblogtemplates.com 2008

Back to TOP